I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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