Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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