I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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