K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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