More tranny stories later!
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
