Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
