i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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