Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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