If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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