so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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