so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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