exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
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