If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES