how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
