Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
