moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
