I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
