Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize