You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi