"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life