I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
