I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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