When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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