too bad you live with your parents still
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name