I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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