Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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