Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
