God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
