Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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