I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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