found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
