Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Randomize
