I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
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or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
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I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her