if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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