i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Randomize
