he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Alive.
So much puke
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
It's not a walk of shame if you run
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
