GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Randomize
