Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize