Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
It's never too late to be topless.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
