THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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