u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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