I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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