Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
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In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
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those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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