is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
