he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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