Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
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Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
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Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
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