Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Randomize
