he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
