David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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