I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
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I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
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Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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