We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
