He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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