she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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