How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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