so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
